America through the Eyes of a Russian Woman Part 1

Every Russian woman who comes to the United States experiences a culture shock. Some experience mild and short one; others long and intense. Even though everyone’s experiences are different, there are a few things about America that most visitors from Russia and the Eastern Europe find particularly foreign.

The first thing that shocked many people (in a positive way) is friendliness of American people. If you ask someone a question on the street people are always willing to help, even if they don’t know the answer and seem to be in a hurry. They are usually patient when it comes to people whose English skills are lacking, and appear to be very kind. Many Russians don’t trust people, especially strangers, so they often just ignore you, or tell you that they are busy and have to run (of course, there are exceptions).

Another thing that comes with friendliness is excessive smiling. Many Russian women who moved here couldn’t get used to strangers smiling at them and asking how they were doing. I have been here for 6 years and I still feel uncomfortable when people I don’t know ask me how I am doing. I guess we are not really trained to do a small talk and many Russians see it as pointless.

Russian women like to smile, but like to do it sincerely. “Fake” smiles are not appreciated in the Russian culture. You will rarely see store clerks smiling at you. To be honest, at first it bothered me a lot that everyone smiled and asked me how I was. I got used to the smiling part and I think I smile a lot now too, but the “how are you” part is still difficult for me.

Another thing that Russian women find bizarre is the way Americans dress. Russian women are very concerned on how they look. They like to emphasize their beauty with make-up and stylish and feminine clothing. Many Russians don’t understand why people who make decent amount of money and can afford to buy nice clothes, wear oversized ugly sweatshirts, jeans with holes and dirty sneakers. I have a couple of friends, both Russians, who live in the U.S. for more than 2 years now. Every time they go out to eat they experience culture shock. On their wedding anniversary they went to a restaurant to celebrate. She was wearing evening dress and high heels; he was wearing a tie and a nice suit. When they came to a restaurant, they were shocked to see people in dirty clothes sitting next to them. For them, when you go to a restaurant, you need to be dressed up. It shows respect not only to your partner, but to the other people in the restaurant.

Americans value comfort more than appearance; Russians value appearance. There is nothing wrong with one way or another. If you want to impress your Russian lady, dress up nicely. At least when you go out. She will surely love it.

(to be continued)

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